It looks a little crusty but I promise it’s healing up smoothly. @caustinm #body #modification #dedication (Taken with instagram)

I have had people in my life that I thought I could trust with every inch of my life, people who I could count on for anything, people who would break their back to help me out. Over time I have come to realize that my friends are MY friends, I’m not exactly their friend. I would do anything for them, but I know I can’t ask them for a helping hand no matter what. I am alone in this life, all of my trust is gone and broken, I am romantically hopeless nor do I care if I ever have a family. I will never be okay with being lonely, but I will settle to deal with it. Everything I’ve ever wished to do with my life has failed so far, I get offered help by people to teach me and to show me a new way, but it’s only ever a kind gesture to satisfy for the moment. I will never expect anything from anybody unless they tell me otherwise, but I know they will not follow through. I am a very unimportant person unless these people need something from me, then I’m the most important person in the universe. I do not expect anything other than a thank you for the things I have done, but I’m never appreciated. It has been the same throughout my entire life, taken advantage of and then left hanging. I have and will always sincerely appreciate anything that is done for me. I am also very aware that I can do a lot on my own, but I can only do so much. I am not perfect, I have my flaws, and I can be an asshole at times, but I am who I am. I will never be discouraged or altered by your judgement. Although I am falling apart from the seams, I try to hold it together for the happiness of my family. They are the most important people I will ever have in my life.

For those of you who have been there for me regardless of the circumstance I thank you and your kindness was and is much appreciated.

I am a very sad person, I am also a very lonely person. There is a hole that seems to never be filled with anything. I don’t think I will ever truly be happy. Any and every time I have something good going for me, it all turns to shit. Whether it be a relationship, work, or even something small and feeble, it never fails. I don’t know how much more I can handle, this pain is endless.

This isn’t a cry for help, I just want people to know what I am going through.

#yolo #is #gay (Taken with instagram)

Please show support haha (Taken with instagram)

#bob #ross (Taken with instagram)

Sometimes I get really hungry… #tacobell (Taken with instagram)

#lowandslow shits low as fuck (Taken with instagram)

Reich it or not (Taken with instagram)

Reich it or not #nazi #adolf #hitler (Taken with instagram)